today i went to CHURCH for the first time in a month, and i was home again at my Christ’s Church of Wrigleyville, zip a dee do dah IT WAS GREAT! my church is amazing. pastor Jon spoke about King Solomon’s view of money as laid out in Ecclesiastes. i didn’t tell anyone i was coming back, i just showed up, and the warmth with which i was recieved was lovely. i sat with some of my favorite girls, and it’s just so amazing when people approached me afterwards to say hello, people who i didn’t think would miss me or even know i was gone. to be told i was missed made me feel so cared for, and in a way very free. i feel like i’ve begun to carve out a place for me in the world.
afterwards i went and checked out my friend aimee’s new apartment, it’s very nice and just around the corner from church. i came home to my parent’s afterwards and some of my second and third cousins were over – i’ve explained to gary a few times that these people are as close as my first cousins, my family is HUGE and very in love with everyone in it – and so some cousins were over to share a meal and catch up. the kids were awesome. i suddenly had more babies to play with, and one of these little tykes was on the verge of walking and so crawled so quickly i was suprised there wasn’t a trail of smoke in his path. very fun.
mandy came over in the evening, mandy is my oldest and dearest friend. we met the summer between seventh and eighth grade, at the wilmette public pool. i was amazed by her. she somehow thought i was cool. nothing has changed. we talked about our lives, she’s also on the brink of many things like i perpetually seem to be. we talked about the nature of f**king up and i decided that to do that you had to give up and give in to things less than your capabilites. poor girl, she thinks that’s what she’s done. i don’t believe it for a second. we fought off that fear of f**king up by making a list of things we need to do by age thirty.
so far the list includes:
• doing a cattle drive in the style of City Slickers
• taking a class in speaking italian
• getting some creative writing published